The Cages We Locked Ourselves In 🥹

 I recently learnt what Lois P. Frankel wanted to mean in ‘Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office.' This rang a bell a few days ago when I suggested my people to challenge on any topic to write about, then My very Young Sister, who always tells me that I am her Role Model, replied with this ‘The cage  we locked ourselves in🥹!’ Seeing that crying emoji from my sister, I accepted the challenge immediately and promised her to work on that story first.

Let’s dive into this story in quite some different approaches… Please, get yourself some drinks and or snacks. Because, as I’m writing this, I am also sipping on my favourite juice, duuuh. Here we gooooo…

The Cages We Locked Ourselves In🥹

In the bustling theatre of life, we often find ourselves playing a role dictated not by our own hearts, but by the expectations of the world around us. We build walls of fear and doubt, then mistake them for the boundaries of our realities. 

This is the self-contradictory cage we lock ourselves in, which is an absurd prison built not of iron, but of our own making. Unfortunately, it is a cage that casts its shadow over every facet of our existence. Be it in families, social life, relationships, education, professions and careers; the rooms remain empty when happiness is mentioned, but full when there is any mention of people pleasing😓

Some of those cages that we lock ourselves 🥹

For families, the cage is woven from the threads of tradition and the silent pressure to conform. We stifle our true voices, fearing disapproval or the disruption of a fragile peace. We often forget that everyone has their own life to live, and we stay in the cage of our relatives’ opinions over our decisions, beliefs, behaviours and choices. Don’t misunderstand my point; they can advise us, their opinions matter, but again at the far end, if we decide according to them and ignore our vision, intuitions and goals, we may land in the pits we never auditioned for.

Shall we look a bit into our relationships and friendships folder? More often, we hesitate to be fully vulnerable, wearing masks of perceived perfection, afraid that our authentic selves might be rejected. This fear prevents genuine connection, trapping us in a cycle of surface-level interactions. This may apply to the boyfriends and girlfriends as well as bestfriends and other kinds of friendships. However you label that, if he/she does something you are not comfortable with, and you decide to never mention that and accept to live in that discomfort, you definitely are fighting a losing battle.

As far as I know, people I used to call friends or close ones are the ones who mastered the art of breaking my hearts the most, yet they knew well how soft my heart was, and there was no single garage for heart Repair. With that being said, God forbid, but the same may happen to you. So, if you truly love them and never want to lose them, you'd better have a good, open and logical conversation with them and come to a mutual understanding that will enable your relationship or friendship to flourish instead of living in that cage.

Some cages seem to be tinny, but still they can hold us tight

The educational and professional worlds offer their own gilded cages. We chase degrees and careers deemed "respectable" or "lucrative," often neglecting the whispers of our passions. Sometimes, we do so to please our parents, guardians, employers or friends. Whatsoever, may you please tell me who is wasting whose time? I have been there and I know what I'm talking about. Being a people pleaser will leave you unattended to and heartbroken.

We remain in jobs and careers we despise, paralyzed by the fear of starting over or the perceived risk of pursuing our dreams. This fear of failure becomes a powerful lock, keeping us from unlocking our true potential. Think of some people who got to know their values and decided to never settle for less… Yes, those ones! Do you realize how far and successful they are? There is no better time than now, and you can still start and still excel. Get out of that cage, if the rope is too tight, let it go for good and patch that wound, take the painkillers and get well soon, be ready to go bigger and do wonders. 

Our social lives, curated for public consumption, become another part of this self-imposed confinement. We present a polished, flawless version of ourselves on social media, adding another bar to the cage and isolating us further from the messy, beautiful reality of our lives. We shall not live for the approvals of likes and comments from people whom we don’t even know, those who care less whether we are okay or not. I’ve mastered how to give them what I want them to consume, and ensure that they think they know all abou Me, but they really don’t. Don’t allow the peer pressure to harass you with the restrictions of its own; never sign that contract. 

Those Cages have the doors in and out, though it costs something on the way out

Yet, the most profound truth about this cage is that its key has always been in our hands. It requires courage, enough courage to challenge family norms, to be vulnerable with a friend, to abandon a secure career for an unknown passion, to follow our dreams and goals, as well as living a life that is truly, authentically our own. It's time to realize that the cage is an illusion, and the only one who can set us free is ourselves. 

All in All, never underestimate the Power of PRAYERS, they work big time, and I am a living testimony of GOD’S WORK through all of these cages and many more that were not mentioned in this piece.

Credits of the topic go to: Young Sissy D.U

✍🏼 Tales of Kajette LLB🌹